Tiger, We Hardly Knew Ye
Will de Kypia
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Tyger, Tyger, burning bright,_..
    on the fairways of the night._..
    —Roger the Beekeeper_.

                 Say it ain't so, Tiger, swear isn't so!

                 Please tell us not one word of it is true,
                 that it is all a pack of wicked lies being
                 spread by some twisted paparazzi spies.

                 You don't know those ladies and would
                 not touch them if you did because the
                 only things you really care about are
                 golf, and your wife, and your kids.

                 Well, I want to believe it ain't so but
                       _sometimes I kinda have to wonder…

                 Do you get loads of email advertisements for
                 magical little blue pills? Pills that can make
                 you lust for extracurricular carnal thrills?
                           
                 Or were potent pharmaceuticals coursing
                 through your brain, the meds you had to take
                 to ease the ache of legs in so much awful pain?

                 Say it ain't so, Tiger, just say that it is not so!

                 And if you happen to get a chance give
                 our very best to Lance and Shoeless Joe.

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